"Make sure that what you are doing and striving for is going to be worth any sacrifices you will have to make along the way. If it's a relationship, job, anything in life."

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Tuesday's Tip: Keeping Control

     Over the past weeknd I noticed my little one start to get bossy.  Over the past few months she has starteed testing the waters more and more.  Telling me no when I ask her to do things.  She also will question me or put up a fight.  This is just their way of seeing how far they can go and becoming older.  I haven't posted this weekends update yet but this past weekend Quinn would stomp her foot when she was mad and not listen.  Sunday was more difficult and usually is.  It is our hardest day becuase she has to go and her and I get sad.  She also just wouldn't go down for her nap and around 4ish she got very hard to deal with.  I did get a bath in however I didn't get her dinner, just breakfast and lunch. 

     I have noticed over time as she get's older she is starting to get mad if she doesn't get her way.  In the morning we were playing and she didn't understand the game and decided to stop and storm off.  It was cute and funny. (Never let them know that)  She just said she was not palying and walked away.  I talked to her and explained we can try to learn it again or we can play something else.  She gets that from me so I really can't do much but deal the best I can.  My tip is how ever to always keep control.  If your child is throwing a fit let them know they need a time out or a minute to cool down.  Make sure how ever they are cleaning up and doing their share as they get older.  I pickup to help but mainly I tell Quinn we don't go out or move on till her toys are put up and the room is clean.  You don't want them to think that when they are done you will do all the work to clean up.  Quinn has gotten so much better and she puts up her toys now when she is done.  She has gotten better at bed time to.  She walks up and doesn't get mad or cry.  She says good night and we head up.  I took the time this weekend to not watch to much TV becuase it was nice out and Sunday mornning it was not easy.  We went outside but she really wanted her TV.  I have just stayed strong and told her we would watch some later. 

     Always remember when you say something, mean it!  Don't cave or give in because you will loose and your child will see that weakness.  They will know if they scream or complain or just keep asking you will cave and they will get their way.  If Quinn needs a time out I put her in her room for  minute and talk to her when she cools down.  By the way Quinn doens't like her door shut so I really haven't had her slam it, she may shut it here an there but I know the door slamming days may come.  I don't care who you are, I think almost everyone in the world slammed a door once in their life!  Slamming a door just tells the other perons you are mad and you are gonna show it!  Well the weekned was wonderful and I really learned a lot.

     I learned to just keep control by making sure what I say i follow up with and that talking to her in a soft tone will work.  If she misses her nap we may have some issues but sometimes they still just need a time out.  If i get very uspet becuase of how she is acting I put her in her room and let her be.  Parents have to remember children will bring us to a boiling point!  They push our buttons, and just get us to the point of asking "why won't you just listen?!  I also find when she keeps asking why, I follow up with, "because I said so".  That is because I need you to do somehting and I don't need a reason!  Remember we as parents can give reasons and that is a good thing, but also sometimes we don't.  We are the parents and for now, what we say goes. 

     To just recap, keep your cool and talk to your child in nice tone.  Have the childs father, mother or your spouse or a friend that maybe over talk to them if you feel you are very upset.  You don't want to scare them or make them feel sad.  Another person can tag in and talk to them while you take a time out and relax.  If they won't listen to anyone, then keep them contained and controlled.  Keeping them safe, but in their room will not cause harm and show them when they are ready to come out listen they can. 

     Let me know of anything else you may use for tips!

Always remember,
You are never alone...


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