My ex and I haven't had the best relationship, mainly because she still refuses to ever ask when she speaks to me. She mainly just emails me what ever demands she needs and then states it like that is what will happen. Not to long ago she emailed me because her family is having a reunion and it will happen on my weekend. She just pretty much told me she will be taking her and I can see her Friday for dinner but have to bring her back that night. I advised I would need to see her more and offered other days on her end to let me see her. Like fathers day over night and another one later. Yes I know she won't let me even have my own child on Fathers Day over night. Again, read your divorce degree people...
She was upset that I was editing what she offered and said she was going to just take that time as her vacation because we are both allowed it. The thing is anytime I ask if I can have Quinn later over night she alters my request and says I can have her later but not over night. I emailed her and told her I wasn't going to loose the other weekend I had in July its not right. I was upset I told her as a teacher she has the whole summer off and should be wanting to share her more. As my girlfriend talked me I thought of something else. I called my ex and left her a peaceful message, I told her how about we switch weekends. She takes the first and last in July, I take the middle two this way we both have enough then. She called back and said she was upset but heard my VM and heard I was peaceful on it and agreed. So we switched weekends which we could have easier if she thought of it but its all set. I am just upset and have told her to just ask nicely. Why is it adults tell kids to be respectful and polite but they yet to follow those own guidelines? How can you tell your child to share, and ask for things with manners. Then go and email your ex and demand they do this or tell them that's how it will go. Every time I need to do anything I always ask her. This year was the first time I sent her an email of letting her know of our vacation without the form of a question.
I'm posting because I can't ask enough, work with you child's other parent. If they are in the child's life the child knows how important they are and not sharing more is only going to hurt them and you. Your child will see how you interact with their other parent. To this day I am still fighting for Insurance cards. For years she has failed to get me copies. At first she said they were hers then she finally said she would get me a copy so I can have if anything happens to our daughter! She has yet to deliver. I will again ask but honestly I don't know what to say, all my single parents said its horrible to keep them like that. the safety of child is more than anything. Since I have her every week at some point I just sometimes hate thinking about it. These honestly are what make being a single parent so hard and stressful. To anyone who is not a single parent just imagine an ex you probably never want to talk to again. Then imagine you have a child and have to see and work with them every week and they demand and treat you less of an equal because they want the control. Now you know what its like. Granted some single parents are best friends and work out everything which is awesome. Some fight about everything and go to court all the time. This is the other side and can be terrible for both parties. Now I didn't post this to say negagive things about my ex, just let the single parent world know to just know how important it is to be respectful.
My blog my not reach the person set in their ways but I will say one day your child will grow up and see how you act, so be nice to your Ex. Work with them and let them do things to be in that child's life. I always feel its so unfair that there are so many woman out there with kids that beg for the father to do more and be more active and I get stuck with the one woman who doesn't want me to do much because it takes away from her doing anything or her family... This is my hardest struggle besides not seeing my daughter. Sometimes I just don't understand... To my readers I hope you work together. If you have your child more I hope you share and work things out. For the parents that always feel they fight to just get an inch I am sorry. Keep being polite ask your ex for things and try to work things out. If they want something talk to them and reason with them. Nothing is worse than a child growing up and learning one parent tried to hard but the other kept them away.
I hope everyone finds some small amount of peace we all so look for...
Always remember...
You are never alone...
Love,
Christopher
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