"Make sure that what you are doing and striving for is going to be worth any sacrifices you will have to make along the way. If it's a relationship, job, anything in life."

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

Tuesday's Tip: How to communicate when an injury occurs.

     I got a call from my ex this past Sunday.  She left a message explaining how Quinn fell off her bike and just bumped her arm.  She took her to the urgent care and checked her out and did an X-Ray.  I called her back and we talked about what happened.  I listened to everything and then told her if she needs anything let us know.  Kayla and I spoke to Quinn and told her were glad shes ok and we know she's a tough cookie.    The next day her Mom advised she didn't need a follow up but her arm is in a sling for a bit.  So I am posting a tip today per what I learned from this first medium injury and how you can learn and be a strong parent if you are divorced and working together.

     I stayed calm when we spoke and was happy she called to advise what we can do.  When you are divorced especially whit new spouses yes the parent that doesn't have the child for that moment can get jealous or upset if they feel left out of something.  So instead of getting mad and saying you should have called sooner, listen to what happen and maybe some of the tips below may help.

     1)   When you get a phone call regarding an injury listen to what happens before jumping in.  If the injury is serious your ex should call you sooner and advise.  If it is minor just hear what happened.  Remember you don't live together so the first priority is to get the child safe then asses what is happening.

     2)   This brings me to this tip, if you have the child and something happens yes get right to the professionals first then after treatment call the people you need.  If the case is very serous call your spouse and advise this soon.  Example if your going to the hospital.

     3)    Very important if you are receiving a phone call that something did happen stay calm.  If your ex already brought your child to the doctor or urgent care then just hear what the story was.  Don't start yelling or getting upset about who was called.  Remember the child's saftey comes first before anything especially jealousy.

     4)     Ask to speak with your child and see how they are now doing and that you care and can't wait to see them.   Let them know how much you love them and let them tell you what the story was.  Kids like to re tell the story too.

     5)    Thank your ex for letting you know what happened and let them know if they need anything to just let you know this.  Be a team player and just be civil.  If the time has passed you can't go back its to late so just be nice and work forward on healing the child.

     Anything more urgent yes call your ex and tell them to meet you asap if it is extreme.  If something went wrong and they didn't tell you, and it was extreme then yes advise them you need to know something like this sooner.  I would really hope everyone out there would.  Bumps and bruises are a part of life and kids get them because they are growing, learning and testing the limits.  Again don't fight over time frames as long as your child is OK and you were notified.  This was the first time something like this went down for us  and everything was OK.  I don't know exactly what time she got hurt but Kayla and I were notified and we spoke to Quinn who was happy to hear from us.  We will see her tomorrow and everything is OK.  It worked out better than yelling or screaming about why I wasn't called right away so just be calm and asses the information.

    I can't tell you how hard it is to be divorced with a child going back and fourth, raising a child is hard enough now take that child away part of the week and see.  Be strong and stay calm.  I hope the following tips helped and if there is anything to add please comment below.

Always Remember,
You are Never Alone...


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