"Make sure that what you are doing and striving for is going to be worth any sacrifices you will have to make along the way. If it's a relationship, job, anything in life."

Tuesday, June 23, 2015

Tuesday's Tip: Kids and their security tools...

     Kids all over need a sleeping aid like a stuffed animal or a blanket of some sorts.  They may like it because it makes them feel safe or smells good.  Since Quinn was small she had a bunny she carried around.  As she grew older she carried it around the house and when she came down stairs.  As she grew older I have tried to think of ways to start leaning her off the bunny.  She is not almost dependent on it and I feel now needs it.  This past weekend she forgot it and her Mom brought it over.  We talked to Quinn and at first she was ok, but she then just couldn't do it she needed it.  I should have advised her Mom not to worry and it was only one night but I advised it was ok for her to come and bring it.  It can be difficult because we want them to be happy and kids but after kindergarten I believe it is time to start making a change to not need your safety blanket or stuffed animal.  I know it can be hard but if you don't start now then it only gets harder. 

     This year when Quinn starts 1st grade we plan on making some more changes for Quinn.  When she comes home now she automatically puts her bunny up which is great, but we plan on only allowing her to have it one night not two.  Also we will be cutter back on her letting her suck her thumb.  I feel her Mom lets her do this whenever and allows her to bring her bunny anywhere.  This will only hurt her more when she gets older.  Rules and guidelines help us understand why we do things.

     So my Tip to you is start early with your child if they suck their thumb or have a clutch they use for bed or all the time start small.

1)  Start when they child is around 4 or 5 so when they reach 6 they understand things like why they have to put away their safety net. 

2) Limit time, only let them use it at bed, don't allow them to bring it down stairs anymore.

3) Talk to them, explain that as they get older they need to know they have to limit things like this.  Big boys and girls have other toys and fun things but they have to slowly let go.

4) Give them other things in their lives like older treats, movies, older toys.  Replace the baby things with bigger ones.  Move them to the next level.

5)  As far as divorced parents, well its hard.  My ex lets Quinn have her safety net whenever she lets her suck he thumb whenever so you have to start and get your child on the path to not getting what makes them feel good all the time.  Life won't do this, you can start or they can learn the hard way...

It takes time and is not easy.  I struggle a lot because of the fact her Mom isn't helping letter our daughter grow up.  I feel like the bad guy but know if I don't life will.  She will grow up and wonder why not everything goes her way, or she will learn in school.  However we as parents have to not shut them down just show them they have to move on and grow up.  Be independent and start to take on older responsibilities even at a younger age!

I do hope this helps and I will keep you posted on Quinn.

Always remember,
You are never alone...


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