I wanted to post to my fellow readers who have or are going though a tough time in their lives. If its a divorce, separation or breakup. Being a single parent for me was scarier than anything I had done. I was afraid of what was going on with the divorce and what would come. I think I put to much trust in my ex which led to more pain. I wanted to write however and say you will get though this. I had many long nights of just the deepest thoughts one can have. I felt like I was in a prison just without bars. When the nights were quiet and long, thoughts set in. Ones of guilt or despair. As time went on I didn't feel there was hope, just work and the time I saw my daughter. I kept busy but secretly went mad. I felt at times I just lost it and was falling apart. Never have I wrote or expressed this to many but there are others that need to know per they maybe feeling this way.
What I also want to say is this will make you stronger, you will rebound and grow from this. Are you ever going to be the same? Well it depends on how hard you were hit emotionally during the divorce and if you have kids keeping you close. For me it's hard, I tell my wife all the time I feel I'm not the same. I'm different or less romantic, maybe still cold inside in some areas or the fact that scar tissue never lets one heal. Weather it be emotional or financial issues you have they can be very difficult to move past. What I will say is you have to fight however. If you have kids never give up on them and keep seeing them. Showing them how much you love them and they will grow up and see your passion. Sometimes I feel I just have to push and fight through the resentment but I have to or it will consume me.
Don't let it consume you, find love and find someone who loves you. Don't let your anger or pain never allow you to heal. You maybe a different person but you will find someone who will love you for that. I can't tell you how close I was to giving up on looking and then Kayla came. I tell my self daily I just want this site to get out to those going through this ordeal so if you know anyone please get them here. There is always hope even in our darkest hour...
You are Never Alone...