"Make sure that what you are doing and striving for is going to be worth any sacrifices you will have to make along the way. If it's a relationship, job, anything in life."

Thursday, January 29, 2015

How special our spouses are...

     There may be one job harder than one of a single parent and that is their loved one.  Their spouse has one hard job.  When my divorce was well behind me I did date a little and it was hard.  I tried looking and actually found my girlfriend of today by just doing the opposite.  However that is a different story for a different day.  I wanted to post about how special the ones that love single parents are.  Not that non single parts aren't but this post is for the single Mom's and Dads....

     A spouse of a single parent does so much, they love us, they love our kids (even thought they aren't theirs).  Their family brings us and our kids in and loves us.  They help with holidays and buy them things like cloths and toys they didn't have to do.  Spouses work hard and they spend their hard earned money on a child they love so much and take in as their own.  Their families do the same, they celebrate events with our children and take them in to their homes.  Showing things like divorce and sadness or anger that those wont win.  Family, love happiness and trust will win, they will overcome some of the darkest feelings a single parent can have. 
    
    I can't tell you enough how stressful it can be being a single Dad.  Sometimes people don't understand and try to advise me this or that and I just remind them it isn't like that or that just wont work.  I tell people it can be hard working with your ex.  Most of us who break up or get divorced in our lives and don't have kids never have to deal with our Ex's again.  They may see them from time to time but that's it.  Try getting out of a relationship and then ever week having to work with and see that person.  You also have to work with them for years and years to come.  When your child is older and on their own you still will have to interact with them a few times.  What makes my day harder is just how much control my daughters Mom has.  We both raise our daughter and have a say but for now she lives with her Mom and I have to work with that until Quinn is old enough to start voicing her opinion.  It isn't easy... 

     Well behind all the frustration is someone who loves us, Kayla has been so good to me and she always helps me get through difficult times and gives me pointers or different paths I can look down so I don't get upset with my Ex and start a fight.  I always tell Kay she can be with someone who doesn't have this mess but she says no and hugs me.  I love how much Quinn does love her, she just simply adores her and always ask when Kay and I are going to get married.  She buys Quinn things and helps with food and cloths and spends her hard earned money on us.  She helps driver Quinn around and takes the time to get he ready in the morning and bond with her when I am not there.

     Recently at work I was denied a week off I wanted to take this coming July per schedules and other people having it off and I was really upset.  It was the week I go to the leadership training for scouts with my dad.  I posted about it not to long ago.  We have so much fun and it is something I look forward to all year.

    When I got home I found flowers and a card in our room!  Kayla got me them because she knew I had a bad day and that I was really sad over not getting approved for the time off for this week that means so much to me.  The card is so loving and the flowers are beautiful.  I put them on the table and now enjoy them.  Single parents have more stress than others because there is just nothing worse than not seeing your child ever day.  I tell parents all the time who do to treasure this because some parents only get to tuck their kids in a few times a week or month...   

     So I wanted to pay a special post and tribute to the loved ones of single Mom's and Dads all over.  Thank you for loving us, our kids and all the baggage we bring to the table.  We do appreciate all you do for us even if we don't say it and couldn't do it with out you....

Thank you so much Kayla for being so amazing to both Quinn and I...
We love you so much!

My beautiful flowers and card!
Always remember,
You are never alone...
Love,
Christopher 

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